Put Together

Someone said to me a while back, “Lisa, you always look so put together.” And I know that she meant it as a complement. She said it with a big smile and a hug. Really, it was a sweet thing to say and it came from the goodness deep within her.

But I’ve been a bit troubled by that statement ever since. Not that it came from her, but that I hope that I don’t come across that way to everyone. And to be honest, I’ve heard that a few more times since then. But I guarantee you, I am most certainly NOT always put together.

On a majority of weekends, there is a high likelihood that at some point during the weekend, I will resemble a hobo. You know, those people who meander around Central Park with pigeons on their shoulders? Ok well, maybe I don’t have pigeons on my shoulders, but I’m usually wearing a mix match of clothes that most people would not be caught dead wearing in public. And the people at the grocery store often get to see this side of me.

Or catch me up at my parents during the holidays. I usually stay in my flannel pants all day. I eat breakfast, lunch AND dinner in them. And if I do have to leave the house, there’s a high likelihood that I may not shower for the outing. So you can imagine how not “put together” I am at times like that. Or take a trip with me, and I promise you, that by the end of Day 2, you will know without a doubt that I am not always “put together.”

If you see me at work, I’ll probably look decent. Likewise, if you see me at church, I’ll probably appear to be put together. And if you catch me at the tail end of a 24 hour flight? You’ll see a side of me that I don’t even see that often. The jet lagged grumpy, frumpy, I-really-want-a-shower-and-clean-clothes version of myself.

The outward appearance

We all know that someone’s outward appearance can leave an impression. But it’s just that, an outward appearance. It doesn’t tell you what’s going on inside. And often times, the outward appearance does not even reflect the true spirit of that person. I agree that there are times when someone is going through something so horrible that they wear it on the outside. But what about all of the other times, when a struggle is more silent? Or someone is dealing with the same insecurities as everyone else? We all have them.

I do like to look nice. And I will admit that I have a passionate love for jewelry, handbags, shoes, and Banana Republic. And when you put those four things together, you can certainly look very put together. But the Bible tells us in 1 Peter 3:3-4 that “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” So do you understand why that statement troubled me?

The internal self

Those who are close to me know without a doubt that I am not always as put together as I may look. They know of my insecurities, my doubts, my concerns, my struggles. Trust me, I have them, just like everyone else. And I can confidently say that nobody is always as put together as they look.

I don’t mean this as a negative vibe toward this person AT ALL. I love that she said it. I also think it teaches me a good lesson. One that reminds me that I need to be myself in all situations. I need to be true to who I am and what I am feeling at the moment, and be sensitive to the fact that my outward appearance does not always reflect what is going on inside. To be fair, I can’t let it. There are too many times and places in my life when I need to look nice and put together, and I can’t afford to look how I feel on the inside. But the important lesson is that I need to make sure that the people who are close to me know what is going on in my life. After all, they are the ones who actually keep me together.